Vampire Academy Chapter 18

EIGHTEENI WOKE UP STARING AT the boring white crownwork of the clinic. A filtered light soothing to Moroi patients sh ane subdue on me. I felt strange, agreeable of disoriented, but I didnt hurt.Rose.The voice was a bid silk on my skin. Gentle. Rich. Turning my head, I met Dimitris dark eyes. He sat in a chair be place the bed I lay on, his shoulder-length brown hair hanging forward and framing his face.Hey, I said, my voice coming out as a croak.How do you feel?Weird. Kind of groggy.Dr. Olendzki gave you something for the pain you awaitmed pretty bad when we brought you in.I dont mean thatHow long bring on I been out?A few hours.Must deplete been strong. Must still be strong. Some of the details came cover version. The bench. My ankle use upting caught. I couldnt remember much after that. Feeling hot and cold and then hot again. Tentatively, I well- act moving the toes on my healthy foot. I dont hurt at on the whole.He shook his head. No. Because you werent dependabl ely injured.The heavy(a) of my ankle cracking came endure to me. Are you sure? I rememberthe way it bent. No. Something mustiness be broken. I manage to sit up, so I could look at my ankle.Or at least sprained.He moved forward to correspond me. Be careful. Your ankle might be fine, but youre probably still a little out of it.I carefully shifted to the edge of the bed and looked down. My jeans were roll up. The ankle looked a little red, but I had no bruises or full marks.God, I got lucky. If Id hurt it, it would nonplus put me out of practice for a while.Smiling, he returned to his chair. I k in a flash. You kept sex act me that while I was carrying you. You were very upset.Youyou carried me here?After we broke the bench apart and freed your foot.Man. Id missed out on a lot. The only thing better than imagining Dimitri carrying me in his arms was imagining him shirtless while carrying me in his arms.Then the reality of the situation hit me.I was interpreted down by a bench, I groaned.What?I survived the whole daytime guarding Lissa, and you guys said I did a good job. Then, I get back here and obtain my downf all(prenominal) in the form of a bench. Ugh. Do you know how embarrassing it is? And all those guys saw, too.It wasnt your fault, he said. No one knew the bench was rotted. It looked fine.Still. I should turn in retributory stuck to the sidewalk homogeneous a standard person. The other novices are going to give me shit when I get back.His lips held back a smile. Maybe presents get out cheer you up.I sat up straighter. Presents?The smile natural springd, and he handed me a small box with a piece of paper.This is from Prince Victor.Surprised that Victor would have given me anything, I read the none. It was just a few lines, hastily scrawled in pen.Rose Im very happy to see you didnt suffer any serious injuries from your fall. Truly, it is a miracle. You lead a charmed life, and Vasilisa is lucky to have you.Thats nice of him, I said, openin g the box. Then I saw what was inside. Whoa. Very nice.It was the rose necklace, the one Lissa had indirect requested to get me but couldnt afford. I held it up, looping its chain everywhere my hand so the glittering, diamond-covered rose hung free.This is pretty extreme for a get-well present, I noted, recalling the price.He actually bought it in honor of you doing so well on your first day as an official guardian. He saw you and Lissa looking at it.Wow. It was all I could say. I dont think back I did that good of a job.I do.Grinning, I placed the necklace back in the box and set it on a nearby table. You did say ?presents, right? Like more than one?He laughed outright, and the sound wrapped around me ilk a caress. God, I loved the sound of his laugh. This is from me.He handed me a small, plain bag. Puzzled and excited, I opened it up. Lip gloss, the kind I liked. Id complained to him a number of times how I was campaign out, but Id never opinion he was paying attention.Howd you manage to buy this? I saw you the whole time at the mall.Guardian secrets.Whats this for? For my first day?No, he said simply. Because I panorama it would make you happy.Without as yet thinking near it, I leaned forward and hugged him. Thank you.Judging from his stiff posture, Id clearly caught him by surprise. And yeahId actually caught myself by surprise, too. and he relaxed a few moments later, and when he reached around and rested his hands on my lower back, I thought I was going to die.Im glad youre better, he said. His mouth sounded like it was almost in my hair, just above my ear. When I saw you fallYou thought, ?Wow, shes a loser. Thats not what I thought.He pulled back slightly, so he could see me better, but we didnt say anything. His eyes were so dark and deep that I wanted to plump down right in. Staring at them made me feel warm all over, like they had flames inside. Slowly, carefully, those long fingers of his reached out and traced the edge of my cheekbone, moving up the side of my face. At the first touch of his skin on mine, I shivered. He wound a lock of my hair around one finger, just like he had in the gym.Swallowing, I dragged my eyes up from his lips. Id been contemplating what itd be like to court him. The thought both excited and scared me, which was paradoxical. Id kissed a lot of guys and never thought much rough it. No reason another one even an older one should be that big of a deal. Yet the thought of him stopping point the distance and bringing his lips to mine made the world start spinning.A soft knock sounded at the door, and I hastily leaned back. Dr. Olendzki stuck her head in. I thought I heard you confabulationing. How do you feel?She walked over and made me lie back down. Touching and bending my ankle, she assessed it for damage and finally shook her head when finished.Youre lucky. With all the noise you made coming in here, I thought your foot had been amputated. Must have just been shock. She stepped back . Id feel better if you sat out from your normal trainings tomorrow, but otherwise, youre good to go.I breathed a sigh of relief. I didnt remember my hysteria and was actually kind of embarrassed that Id thrown such a fit but I had been right about the problems this would have caused me if Id broken or sprained it. I couldnt afford to lose any time here I needed to take my trials and graduate in the spring.Dr. Olendzki gave me the okay to go and then left(p) the room. Dimitri walked over to another chair and brought me my shoes and coat. Looking at him, I felt a warm flush sweep me as I recalled what had happened before the doctor had entered.He watched as I slipped one of the shoes on. You have a guardian angel.I dont believe in angels, I told him. I believe in what I can do for myself.Well then, you have an painful body. I glanced up at him with a questioning look. For healing, I mean. I heard about the accidentHe didnt specify which accident it was, but it could be only one. Talking about it normally bothered me, but with him, I felt I could say anything.Everyone said I shouldnt have survived, I explained. Because of where I sat and the way the car hit the tree. Lissa was really the only one in a secure spot. She and I walked away with only a few scratches.And you dont believe in angels or miracles.Nope. I Truly, it is a miracle. You lead a charmed life.And just like that, a million thoughts came slamming into my head. Maybe by chance I had a guardian angel after allDimitri immediately noticed the shift in my feelings. Whats wrong?Reaching out with my mind, I tried to expand the bond and shake off the lingering effects of the pain medication. Some more of Lissas feelings came through to me. Anxious. Upset.Wheres Lissa? Was she here?I dont know where she is. She wouldnt leave your side while I brought you in. She stayed right next the bed, right up until the doctor came in. You calmed down when she sat next to you. I closed my eyes and felt like I might faint. I had calmed down when Lissa sat next to me because shed taken the pain away. Shed healed meJust as she had the night of the accident.It all made experience now. I shouldnt have survived. Everyone had said so. Who knew what kind of injuries Id actually suffered? Internal bleeding. Broken bones. It didnt matter because Lissa had fixed it, just like shed fixed everything else. That was why shed been leaning over me when I woke up.It was also probably why shed passed out when they took her to the hospital. Shed been exhausted for days afterward. And that was when her depression had begun. It had seemed like a normal reaction after losing her family, but now I wondered if there was more to it, if healing me had played a role.Opening my mind again, I reached out to her, needing to find her. If shed healed me, there was no telling what shape she could be in now. Her moods and magic were linked, and this had been a pretty intense show of magic.The drug was almost gone from my syst em, and like that, I snapped into her. It was almost low-cal now. A tidal wave of emotions hit me, worse than when her nightmares engulfed me. Id never felt such intensity from her before.She sat in the chapels attic, holler. She didnt entirely know why she was crying either. She felt happy and relieved that Id been unharmed, that shed been able to heal me. At the same time, she felt weak in both body and mind. She burned inside, like shed illogical part of herself. She worried Id be mad because shed used her powers. She dreaded going through another school day tomorrow, pretending she liked being with a crowd who had no other interests aside from spending their families money and making fun of those less beautiful and less popular. She didnt want to go to the dance with Aaron and see him watch her so adoringly and feel him touching her when she felt only friendship for him.Most of these were all normal concerns, but they hit her hard, harder than they would an ordinary person, I thought. She couldnt sort through them or figure out how to fix them.You okay?She looked up and brushed the hair away from where it stuck to her wet cheeks. Christian stood in the access to the attic. She hadnt even heard him come up the stairs. Shed been too lost in her own grief. A flicker of both longing and anger sparked within her.Im fine, she snapped. Sniffling, she tried to stop her tears, not wanting him to see her weak.Leaning against the wall, he crossed his arms and wore an unreadable expression. Dodo you want to talk?Oh She laughed harshly. You want to talk now? After I tried so many times I didnt want that That was Rose He cut himself off and I flinched. I was totally busted.Lissa stood up and strode toward him. What about Rose?Nothing. His mask of indifference slipped back into place. Forget it.What about Rose? She stepped closer. Even through her anger, she still felt that unaccountable attraction to him. And then she understood. She made you, didnt she? She to ld you to stop talking to me?He stared stonily ahead. It was probably for the best. I would have just messed things up for you. You wouldnt be where you are now.Whats that vatic to mean?What do you think it means? God. People live or die at your command now, Your Highness.Youre being kind of melodramatic.Am I? alone day, I hear people talking about what youre doing and what youre thinking and what youre wearing. Whether youll approve. Who you like. Who you hate. Theyre your puppets.Its not like that. Besides, I had to do it. To get back at MiaRolling his eyes, he looked away from her. You dont even know what youre getting back at her for.Lissas anger flared. She set up Jesse and Ralf to say those things about Rose I couldnt let her get away with that.Rose is tough. She would have gotten over it.You didnt see her, she replied obstinately. She was crying.So? People cry. Youre crying.Not Rose.He turned back to her, a dark smile curled his lips. Ive never seen anything like you two. A lways so worried about each other. I get her thing some kind of weird guardian term of enlistment but youre just the same.Shes my friend.I guess its that simple. I wouldnt know. He sighed, momentarily thoughtful, then snapped back to sarcastic mode. Anyway. Mia. So you got back at her over what she did to Rose. But youre missing the point. Why did she do it?Lissa frowned. Because she was jealous about me and Aaron More to it than that, Princess. What did she have to be jealous about? She already had him. She didnt need to attack you to drive that home. She could have just made a big show of being all over him. Sort of like you are now, he added wryly.Okay. What else is there, then? Why did she want to ruin my life? I never did anything to her before all this, I mean.He leaned forward, crystal-blue eyes boring into hers.Youre right. You didnt but your chum salmon did.Lissa pulled away from him. You dont know anything about my brother.I know he screwed Mia over. Literally.Stop it, stop lying.Im not. Swear to God or whoever else you want to believe in. I used to talk to Mia now and then, back when she was a freshman. She wasnt very popular, but she was smart. Still is. She used to work on a lot of committees with royals dances and stuff. I dont know all of it. But she got to know your brother on one of those, and they sort of got together.They did not. I would have known. Andre would have told me.Nope. He didnt tell anyone. He told her not to either. He convinced her it should be some kind of romantic secret when really, he just didnt want any of his friends to find out he was getting naked with a non-royal freshman.If Mia told you that, she was making it up, exclaimed Lissa.Yeah, well, I dont think she was making it up when I saw her crying. He got tired of her after a few weeks and dumped her. Told her she was too young and that he couldnt really get serious with someone who wasnt from a good family. From what I understand, he wasnt even nice about it e ither didnt even bother with the ?lets be friends stuff.Lissa pushed herself into Christians face. You didnt even know Andre He would never have done that.You didnt know him. Im sure he was nice to his baby sister Im sure he loved you. But in school, with his friends, he was just as much of a jerk as the rest of the royals. I saw him because I see everything. Easy when no one notices you.She held back a sob, unsure whether to believe him or not. So this is why Mia hates me?Yup. She hates you because of him. That, and because youre royal and shes insecure around all royals, which is why she worked so hard to claw up the ranks and be their friend. I think its a coincidence that she ended up with your ex-boyfriend, but now that youre back, that probably made it worse. Between stealing him and spreading those stories about her parents, you guys really picked the best ways to make her suffer. Nice work.The smallest pang of guilt lurched inside of her. I still think youre lying.Im a lot of things, but Im not a liar. Thats your department. And Roses.We dont Exaggerate stories about peoples families? Say that you hate me? Pretend to be friends with people you think are stupid? Date a guy you dont like?I like him.Like or like?Oh, theres a difference?Yes. Like is when you date a big, blond moron and laugh at his stupid jokes.Then, out of nowhere, he leaned forward and kissed her. It was hot and fast and furious, an outpouring of the rage and passion and longing that Christian always kept locked inside of him. Lissa had never been kissed like that, and I felt her respond to it, respond to him how he made her feel so much more alive than Aaron or anyone else could.Christian pulled back from the kiss but still kept his face next to hers.Thats what you do with someone you like.Lissas heart pounded with both anger and desire. Well, I dont like or like you. And I think you and Mia are both lying about Andre. Aaron would never make up anything like that.Thats because Aaron doesnt say anything that requires words of more than one syllable.She pulled away. abbreviate out. Get away from me.He looked around comically. You cant throw me out. We both signed the lease.Get. Out she yelled. I hate youHe bowed. Anything you want, Your Highness. With a final dark look, he left the attic.Lissa sank to her knees, letting out the tears shed held back from him. I could barely make sense out of all the things hurting her. God only knew things upset me like the Jesse incident but they didnt attack me in the same way. They swirled within her, beating at her brain. The stories about Andre. Mias hate. Christians kiss. Healing me. This, I realized, was what real depression felt like. What imbecility felt like.Overcome, drowning in her own pain, Lissa made the only decision she could. The only thing she could do to channel all of these emotions. She opened up her purse and constitute the tiny razor blade she always carriedSickened, yet unable to break away, I felt as she cut her left arm, making perfectly even marks, watching as the blood flowed across her white skin. As always, she avoided veins, but her cuts were deeper this time. The cutting stung horribly, yet in doing it, she was able to focus on the sensual pain, distract herself from the mental anguish so that she could feel like she was in control.Drops of blood splattered onto the dusty floor, and her world began spinning. Seeing her own blood intrigued her. She had taken blood from others her entire life. Me. The feeders. Now, here it was, leaking out. With a nervous giggle, she decided it was funny. Maybe by letting it out, she was giving it back to those shed stolen it from. Or maybe she was expend it, wasting the sacred Dragomir blood that everyone obsessed over.Id forced my way into her head, and now I couldnt get out. Her emotions had ensnared me now they were too strong and too powerful. But I had to escape I knew it with every ounce of my being. I had to stop her. She was to o weak from the healing to lose this much blood. It was time to tell someone.Breaking out at last, I found myself back in the clinic. Dimitris hands were on me, gently shaking me as he said my name over and over in an effort to get my attention. Dr. Olendzki stood beside him, face dark and concerned.I stared at Dimitri, truly seeing how much he worried and cared about me. Christian had told me to get help, to go to someone I trusted about Lissa. Id ignored the advice because I didnt trust anyone except her. But looking at Dimitri now, feeling that sense of understanding we shared, I knew that I did trust someone else.I felt my voice crack as I spoke. I know where she is. Lissa. We have to help her.